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May 14, 2005

I'm glad Tiger finally missed a cut!

It was nice to see Tiger Woods miss the cut yesterday after making 142 consecutive cuts. I wish I could have seen the video of Tiger unpacking his locker. This was the first cut he's missed since 1998, I can assure you he'll miss more this year.

Here are: No Three Putts 2005 Tiger Woods Predictions

March 29, 2005

Masters Prediction

Since I'm going on vacation for the next 10 days, I thought I'd make my Masters prediction now.

No Three Putts says Ernie Els will win this year.

A couple of other predictions: Tiger Woods will miss the cut. Phil Mickelson will wear a bra so his man boobs won't bounce so much.

Gambling on Golf

If you ever have the urge to gamble on golf, check out: Golfing Gods

March 27, 2005


How many times have you driven your cart up the middle of a fairway when you see a headcover just sitting there? I'd say every other round I find a headcover of some poor bastard who thought it was on his club. I recently found a golf product that makes sense and will alleviate the hassle of keeping a tab on your headcovers when you should be focusing on golf and only golf.

The CaddyClaw is simple to use and securely attaches your headcovers to your golf bag. If you've ever lost a headcover or know someone who has, I'd suggest you check out and buy the CaddyClaw.

From personal experience I know that it sucks when you have one odd ball headcover on your bag.

March 21, 2005

Vijay the Choker

The last two weeks Vijay has had major chokes to lose tournaments. At the Honda Classic he missed a very short putt to lose the playoff. This week at Bay Hill he dumped it into the water to lose the tourney.

The good news is his second place finish at Bay Hill was enough to bump Tiger out of the number one spot.

Vijay is finally showing us that he's human and not a machine.

Strike the pose Vijay.

Oh how we change...

As we age, our priorities change....

The other day I came home and was greeted by my wife, dressed only in very sexy underwear and holding a couple of short velvet ropes.

"Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

So, I tied her up and went golfing.

March 01, 2005

Jogging, working out & golf. WTF?

About 6 weeks ago Mrs. No Three Putts dragged me to the gym to join her for a workout. So I reluctantly went and got a week long pass to try it out. Little did I know, I'd become hooked on fitness. It's unreal. I now jog in the morning at 6:00 AM before work, then when I get home in the evening from work I go to the gym and workout.

Heck I even ran in a 5K race after three weeks of training. Race Results - I'm in the 35-39 age group.

Why do I mention this recent fitness bug I've gotten? Because I've played golf 3 times since I started and I have not played better golf in over 10 years. I am trying to figure this all out. I start running, working out and even eating healthy (something I have never done in my life) now all of a sudden I can play golf again. Does getting my lazy ass into shape really equate to better golf? I'm not sure. I think psychologically it has helped me, which in turn has improved the mental part of my golf game.

I get out there now and I do very little thinking. The less thinking I do on the golf course the better. I played today under fairly windy conditions out at Emerald Dunes in West Palm Beach and shot a very solid 81. And to think I could have been at the office today.

A day of golf, instead of work, is like a sore pecker, you can't beat it.

February 17, 2005

Golf Adventure Guide

Rob over at Golf Adventure Guides sent me a link to this satellite image of Ireland. Big deal a satellite image of Ireland. What's cool about this image is that many golf courses in Ireland are labeled on the image. Satellite Image of Ireland's Golf Courses

February 15, 2005

I played golf

Last week No Three Putts went out and played at The Links at Madison Green in Royal Palm Beach, FL. I hadn't played in about 6 weeks so my expectations were low. Surprisingly I had my best round in about 10 years. Why did I play so well? My putter was on friggin fire! I took 29 putts. The night before I played I read an article about putting. It said for putts under 10 feet to look at the hole not the ball. Well in my mind you'd have to be out of your head not to look at the ball, but what I did was focus on the ball and the hole. Somehow it worked.

As for the golf course. The Links at Madison Green was in great shape, but not the type of golf course I could play everyday. Too many holes that a good drive down the middle of the fairway could actually penalize you on. Doglegs in every direction. I'd play there again but I'll wait until summer time when the rates go down.

If you actually care, I shot a 78. 42 on the front and 36 on the back. I was 2 under on the back nine going into 18. What do I do? Double bogey the last hole. Can you say choke?

Mickelson wins again

For the first time in his career Phil Mickelson has won two consecutive golf tournaments. Could the Callaway clubs that I have bashed in the past really be good golf clubs? I don't think so. My thoughts on why Mickelson has won twice are this: Mickelson is a great golfer. It took Phil a few months to adjust to his new crappy Callaway clubs.

Go get 'em Phil 'Man Boobs' Mickelson!

February 05, 2005

2005 Tiger Woods Predictions

Here's the 10 predictions that I, No Three Putts, know will happen in the world of Tiger:

1. Tiger will miss a cut, twice.
2. Tiger will admit his Nike clubs suck and join Phil at Callaway.
3. Tiger will not win a major again this year.
4. Elin will become pregnant. Another perfect excuse for poor play.
5. Tiger is baffled as to how Elin became pregnant, they haven't had sex yet.
6. Tiger and caddie Steve Williams go public about their love for one another.
7. Pimp Daddy Vijay Singh admits he's the father of Elin's baby.
8. Tiger and Steve break up. Tiger gets a new caddie.
9. Tiger admits that Buick makes crappy old man cars.
10. Butch Harmon is back.

We'll see just how good I am at making predictions. I don't think Dionne Warwick has a thing on me.

January 29, 2005

Winter + Boston = No Golf :(

Here's what my friends up in Boston think of the recent snowfall...

January 28, 2005

One Word for David Duval: RETIRE

David Duval is off to yet another stellar performance at the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic. His rounds look like this: 82,79,85. Meanwhile, Joe Oglivie, the current leader, is now 53 strokes ahead of Duval, who like usual is sitting alone in last place at 30 over par.

David Duval, do yourself, your friends, your family and all of us a favor, stop embarrassing yourself and retire.

January 24, 2005

Just the facts...from 1923

In 1923, Who Was . . .

1. President of the largest steel company?

2. President of the largest gas company?

3. President of the New York Stock Exchange?

4. Greatest wheat speculator?

5. President of the Bank of International Settlement?

6. Great Bear of Wall Street?

These men were considered some of the worlds most successful of their days. Now, 81 years later, the history book asks us, if we know what ultimately became of them.

The Answers:

1. The president of the largest steel company. Charles Schwab, died a pauper.

2. The president of the largest gas company, Edward Hopson, went insane.

3. The president of the NYSE, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home.

4. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad, penniless.

5. The president of the Bank of International Settlement, shot himself.

6 The Great Bear of Wall Street, Cosabee Livermore, also committed suicide.

However, in that same year, 1923, the PGA Champion and the winner of the most important golf tournament, the US Open, was Gene Sarazen.

What became of him? He played golf until he was 92, died in 1999 at the age of 95. He was financially secure at the time of his death.

The Moral: Screw work. Play golf!

January 19, 2005

Is Vijay Singh a dick?

Vijay Singh's caddy, Dave Renwick, is taking a break from schlepping for Vijay.

"I just wasn't happy with the ways things were going or the way I was getting treated, " Renwick said. "I never got a 'Good morning,' or 'Good club' after a shot, or 'Have a nice night' at the end of the day. It was either nothing or a negative if he did speak to me."

I don't think Vijay is a dick, I think Dave Renwick is a complete moron and a baby. Dave, you work for Vijay, that is it, you should do your damn job and enjoy the big fat checks you were taking home. He is your friggin employer, he pays you to work for him. No where in the employee, employer relationship does it state that you also have to be friends or have a personal relationship.

How stupid is Dave Renwick? How do you leave the number one player in the world because he didn't say good morning? Are you that hard-up for friends?

This move is as smart as Phil Mickelson switching to Callaway during the middle of the best year of his career last year. It's like wiping your ass before you take a dump. It just makes no sense. No Three Putts is back, beyotch.

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