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February 15, 2010

The Incredible Jordan Thomas Story

Imagine this horrific scene, if you can…

It’s a beautiful mid-August summer day. The sky is clear blue, not a cloud in sight. The water is a magnificent turquoise blue, sparkling from sunlight.

The air is calm, hot and sticky, as your son jumps off the back of the boat.

As you glance back to watch him, the smile on your face quickly disappears.

The beautiful water has quickly turned to red from blood. Your son is screaming.

You realize the boat’s wake has violently pulled your son into the razor-sharp, whirling propellers.

At first, you think you are seeing things, this can’t be happening – it’s not real. But it is.

Would you know what to do? Could you handle the stress, the pressure?

Well, luckily for Jordan Thomas – his parents are doctors, and they could.

Perhaps it's best if you hear it in his own words:

If this story doesn't bring a tear to your eye, you may not be human.

Let’s take a trip back to 2005 and head to the warm Florida Keys waters…

At the time Jordan, who was captain of his high school's golf team, was 16 when the accident happened.

As he put it, “It was a beautiful day, and we were going to go scuba diving… I looked down - my black fins were gone, and all I saw was red just everywhere... But I had this unbelievable calmness over my body."

His parents, both doctors from Chattanooga, Tennessee, knew exactly what to do.

"All of a sudden, my 16-year old, happy-go-lucky captain of the golf team was potentially dying," said Dr. Liz Kennedy-Thomas.

Jordan was sent to the Ryder Trauma Center in Miami where he underwent 3 surgeries. Losing both of his legs from the calf down. He spent two weeks in the hospital and returned home for rehab.

In 2007, he graduated from the McCallie School in Chattanooga, Tennessee. There he was a member of the golf and bowling teams.

While in rehab he set a goal to rejoin his teammates for his senior year.

And get this, he did!
Right now, he’s in his sophomore year at the College of Charleston (Go Cougars!).

Of course, the story doesn’t end there.

You see, while Jordan was in the hospital – something incredible happened.

He realized that there are hundreds, even thousands, of kids who would never be able to play golf, bowl or do whatever it is they enjoy doing because they don’t have enough money.

Enough money to pay for rehabilitation, prosthetics, or the surgeries they need to be able to improve and cope with life better.

In particular, there was one boy he met in the hospital that had a tremendous impact on what he would decide to devote a good portion of his life to.

His name is Larry (no relation to yours truly).

Larry was severely burned and recovering in the Trauma Rehabilitation Unit. But he didn’t have the financial resources to continue his rehabilitation after discharge.

Even worse, Larry was placed on a waiting list to go to a foster home - his parents had abandoned him.

As Jordan put it, "I just remember seeing so many kids who didn't have parents, didn't have health care… I just knew that the future was grim for them."

At that moment, Jordan realized how much loving support he received during his recovery. And how fortunate he was that his parents had the resources to pay for $24,000 prosthetic legs so he could play golf again.

With that in mind, he established the Jordan Thomas Foundation.

The goal of JTF: To Rebuild Children After Traumatic Injury

So how is the Foundation doing these days?

Well, the folks at CNN think the Foundation is doing amazing work. That's why Jordan Thomas was selected as one of CNN’s Top Ten Heroes for 2009.

That should give you a bit of insight as to the incredible work this young man, he's now 20, is doing.

Today, Jordan is a junior at the College of Charleston, and his Jordan Thomas Foundation is going strong. He’s raised over $400,000 to help children. He’s done this through the sale of bracelets, BBQ’s and a charity golf tournament. INCREDIBLE!

Indeed, Jordan is an incredible young man. I encourage you to read the stories of the beneficiaries who he has helped. If these little stories don't inspire you to donate at least a few dollars to this great foundation - again, you may not be human.

To find out more about the children Jordan is helping, the Foundation itself, or more importantly to DONATE (hint, hint) – just click here now!

February 10, 2010

Here's How Donald Trump Kicks a Member Out of Trump International Golf Club

Let's face it, when it comes to Donald Trump ya either like or dislike him. For most people there's really no kinda, sorta, or in between... it's one or the other.

I've always liked him. For several reasons...

For one, he's a heck of a business man. He sets his sight on something and come hell or high water - he makes it happen.

He says what's on his mind. He doesn't care what people think or about 'political correctness'... when he has something to say - he says it. Ya gotta respect a man with convictions.

And, way back when, when I was a young lad... I valet parked cars for him at Mar-a-Lago. One night, on the eve of an elegant party - I did the one thing the 'help' wasn't supposed to do: I talked to The Donald. I couldn't help it. The valet gig was just a way for me to make a couple extra bucks and have some fun.

So what did we talk about? Well, earlier that morning on my ride to work I heard Mr. Trump on the Howard Stern Radio Show and I simply said, "Good interview on Howard this morning." He looked at me, shook his head, smiled and said, "Thanks, it was a lot of fun."

Nothing earth shattering, but it was good to see he has a solid sense of humor.

Now, back to why I'm really writing today...

Last year, a guy named Harry Theodoracopulos was a member of Trump International Golf Club, it's in West Palm Beach near a prison (seriously) - down the road about 15 miles from where I live. I've never played there, but I've been there for the LPGA event that's there each November.

Well, apparently Mr. Theodoracopulos is a loud, obnoxious, and repulsive man who threatened a caddy with a golf club one day. But get this, that's not why he was kicked out, although it's part of the reason.

Does this look like a rich, spoiled Palm Beacher to you?


One day while Harry (his last name is too long to keep typing) was yelling and screaming about something there were prospective members taking a tour of the club. After hearing the tirade they decided Trump International Golf Club is not right for them.

As we all know, money talks when it comes to Trump... So when word got to him that Harry just cost him a few hundred thousand dollars in membership dues. He was livid.

What did he do? He sent Harry the following letter revoking his membership.
Read Part One Here
Read Part Two Here

Good for you Donald Trump - that letter is an instant classic in my book. Just cause someone is rich (Theodoracopulos) doesn't give him the right to do whatever he wants. It's good to see his money is no longer good at Trump International.

February 06, 2010

The Nick Lachey & Jimmy Johnson Super Skins Celebrity Golf Tournament

Hey all you Clay Aiken fans - it took just 7 hours! Yep, that's it.

Just 7 hours after my previous post, one of you emailed me an article on a celebrity charity golf tournament that benefits kids. Nice work folks, give yourselves a pat on the back.

Now, if I may, I'd like to do something, Clay Aiken, and his fans, refer to as: "Using Your Voice."

Turns out, I missed the 3rd Annual Super Skins Celebrity Golf Classic Tee Off at The Biltmore Hotel & Golf Club (A beautiful hotel, with an amazing pool - I highly recommend it!) in Coral Gables, Florida, by a single day.

But, that's okay, it's still more than worthy of a mention. Here's why...

The Super Skins event is chaired by NASCAR Driver Jimmie Johnson and Singer Nick Lachey. Two young men who could be doing a million other fun things right now, besides hosting a charitable golf tournament, but they're not.
Photo from fOTOGLIF

Nick and Jimmie are taking advantage of their celebrity status - and putting it to great use - by raising money for charity. Nice work gentlemen.

So why the word "Super" in the tournaments name? Good question, and here's (hopefully) a good answer. Each year, Lachey and Johnson host the event on Super Bowl weekend at a golf club in the host city.

It's a smart idea, really. With all the celebrities and folks with "deep pockets" at an event like this - why not raise money for a good cause or two.

Their goal: To raise $1 million for charity this year. Considering they raised over $600,000 last year, they may have a chance.

As for the celebs playing in the event. Here's a few: Joey Fatone, Drew Lachey, NFL greats Jason Sehorn, Michael Strahan, Jerry Rice, Dhani Jones, Jason Taylor and Matt Ryan; baseball legends Ken Griffey Jr., Jamie Moyer and Jeff Fassero; and WPGA pro golfer Cristie Kerr.

Now, for those of you who are not familiar with Nick Lachey, a bit of background...

Lachey is a singer and the former front-man for the band 98 Degrees (they sold over 10 million albums). Today, he has a successful solo music career. But I don't know him from his music, not at all. I know Lachey from the reality TV show he had with his now ex-wife Jessica Simpson.

But I'm not here today to write a biography about Lachey, I'm here to tell you where the money raised at this charity golf tournament is going.

Lachey is the founder of The Nick Lachey Foundation, an organization that supports different schools and charities throughout the U.S. His primary focus is children’s and humanitarian causes with a focus on the Make-a-Wish Foundation and Feeding America.

You can really here the passion in his voice when he talks about the event, "Last year's Super Skins proved to be one of the highlights of my year... Jimmie and I were blown away at the amount of support we received last year even in difficult economic times. We're looking forward to yet another successful year driving much-needed funds to causes that so desperately need them."

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find a website to give you a little more info on Nick's Foundation.

So what I'd like to do is show you what Jimmie Johnson, the 5-time NASCAR winner, is all about... cause it's quite a nice story. In fact, it looks like he's starting to tear up at the end of the video:



This mission of The Jimmie Johnson Foundation: To assist children, families and communities in need throughout the United States.

That's a mighty lofty goal, but they're well on their way. Here's what I mean...

The Foundation has already helped save tens of thousands of lives through blood collection and by adding individuals to the National Marrow Donor Program Registry®. They have also granted wishes to children and adults in need.

As Johnson so eloquently put it, "It has truly been magical."

To date, The Jimmie Johnson Foundation has contributed over $2 million to various organizations since its inception in 2006. They do a lot of work nationally, but Johnson has also begun to make an impact in his hometown of El Cajon, CA and in his adopted new home of Charlotte, NC. Soon, they expect to begin doing work in his wife Chandra Janway Johnson's home state, Oklahoma.

I really like to see people who go back to their roots, the place that made them into who they are today and give back like that.

To donate to the Jimmie Johnson Foundation directly click here or if you'd prefer to get one of the cool Helmet of Hope t-shirts (see below) - they're just $10 bucks - you can get one now by clicking right here. The best part: All proceeds goes directly to the Foundation.


Phew, that's a lot more than I expected to write today.

Have a great weekend,
Larry

P.S. Thanks to all of you who have have supported No Three Putts and his growing family (and my advertisers) by cl1ck1ng on the links on this page.

P.P.S. Remember, if you hear about a charity (preferably one with a website) that's having a golf tournament - please send me a link.

P.P.P.S. It will be interesting to see if there's a difference in response from different fans. For instance, who will have more fans coming to the site... Nick Lachey... Jimmie Johnson... or Clay Aiken? Which fans will leave more comments? Who will Tweet/Facebook these posts more? Only time will tell, but I'll be sure to share the results.

February 05, 2010

How You Crazy Clay Aiken Fans & A Brief Talk With Mother Inspired Me

Since Tuesday night, 4,658 Clay Aiken fans have visited this golf blog. That’s pretty darn amazing if you ask me.

In fact, I was so impressed with how passionate every one is with Clay and his National Inclusion Project that I shared the craziness from the last few days with my Mother today.

I sent her links to the blog posts I wrote and I specifically asked her to read all of the comments you people left.

(Brief side note: I’m not sure whether I should call you all: Clay Mates, Clay Nation or Clay Heads (like Dead Heads)… I’m smart enough to know “you people” isn’t right. :)  And I’m also sure that about 37 of you will let me know the proper term).

Now back to my story…

She summed it up by saying, “Wow. I can’t believe the response you’ve had. Your becoming such a humanitarian like your Grandfather was.”

For a bit of background on my Grandfather you can read this really cool post I wrote last month in honor of his birthday.

And that got me thinking…

Is there any thing I could do to keep up the family tradition by giving back to people in need, more specifically – to children.

Considering I have a family, I coach sports for my sons, I try my best to help my wife around the house, and I work in between all of this – I knew that I really don’t have much free time to spare.

Then - BAM!

It hit me like a sliced golf ball.

I’ve got this golf blog. I just posted a little ditty about Clay Aiken and his National Inclusion Product… and some pretty cool things are starting to happen…

Why don’t I post more stories like Clay’s in the future?

And that’s exactly what I’ve decided to do. Going forward, I am going to scour the internet for celebrity (and non-celebrity) charity golf tournaments and post stories about them.

Let me be clear, although I prefer to promote child-oriented charitable events – I have absolutely no problem posting stories on charities for other worthy causes.

My goal: To raise a few dollars for the charity and to raise awareness of whatever the cause may be.

So if you happen to know of any charity golf tournaments in the near future – please let me know. I’d be happy to post a brief write-up and provide a link. No strings attached.

Thanks,
Larry the Golfer

P.S. Again, thanks to all the Clay Aiken fans for the kind words on your forums and blogs. To the person who asked if I knew about “Goodsearch”… I do now, and I’ll try to add it to this blog at some point soon.

P.P.S. To all of you who bought a hat to support Ken Green: Thank you very much. He and I really appreciate it. I’m sure he’ll post a message soon saying so himself.

P.P.P.S. Since I know about 29 of you will ask if I listened to any of the 458 songs you suggested. The answer is yes. But did I like his music? In short, I did. He has a solid voice.

But I need to be honest with you, I think it’s his stage presence that impressed me the most. I really enjoy the way he riffs with the crowd. In particular, there was one video I watched where he kept going on about the lady in the 4th row, and the one in the 5th row. It was pretty funny. I’m sure you Clay-riffic people know the video I’m talking about. Am I right?

P.P.P.P.S. And now I know what NJU means!

February 04, 2010

Tragedy Strikes Ken Green Again... But That Won't Stop His Comeback!

Let me take you back a few years...

It's 1982, I'm 13 years-old living in Portland, CT (Yes, there is a Portland in Connecticut). Golf is now my passion. I play it, read about it and watch it on TV as much as possible.

And up through the ranks comes a young guy with glasses from Connecticut wearing emerald green golf shoes.
Finally, someone from the Nutmeg state is on tour!

In a small state like CT, Kenny Green instantly becomes a hometown hero. Considering his accomplishments in the eighties it's not hard to see why.

Here's a look at results from his entire career:

Earned card at Q-School in Fall 1981 (after failing in ’79 & ’80)
Lost card after 1982 $11,899; regained card at ’82 Q-School
Lost card after 1984 $20,160, regained card at ’84 Q-School
Won the 1985 Buick Open, his 1st of 5 PGA Tour wins
PGA Career Earnings: $4,046,331
PGA TOUR (1982-2006) $3,745,345:
. . .508 events played, 274 cuts made
. . .Tour Wins: 5
. . .93 Top25’s, 44 Top10’s, 7 2nds, 4 3rds
NATIONWIDE TOUR (2005-2008) $154,169:
. . .55 events, 20 cuts, 1 3rd 6 Top10, 12 Top25
CHAMPIONS TOUR (2008-2009) $146,817:
. . .18 events, 18 cuts, 1 Top10, 2 Top25

With 5 PGA Tour wins, including two in a row, no doubt he's had a remarkable career.

But as we all know, golf is a very mental game... without a clear head it's unlikely any golfer can succeed at such a high level of play. And this is exactly what caused things to start going downhill for Ken Green.

Let's spring ahead to the mid-90's and see what's going on...

Green's life is beginning to spiral downward. He went through a brutal divorce, suffered depression, went into debt and (like many people in his situation) began drinking.

As he put it, "There are years, whole years from about 1998 to 2002 that I basically don't remember."

His life was such a mess that he even had thoughts of suicide.

But Green is a strong guy, has a lot of friends, and got through his bout with depression (etc.). He began playing golf again, this time on the Nationwide Tour. He had moderate success. In his head, he knew this was a great way to gear himself up for the Champions Tour as he approached 50 years-old.

During this time, he met a great woman who motivated, encouraged and helped him get his life in order. Things are looking up.

Kenny is now on the Champions Tour and having success, life is good. But then tragedy struck.

While driving between golf tournaments on June 8, 2009 on a Mississippi highway his RV blew out a tire, rolled over and was in a horrific accident.

Green lost his brother, Billy, his girlfriend, Jeanne Hodgin, and his dog, Nip - who he once saved from the jaws of an alligator by jumping in a canal behind his house and hitting the gator - in the accident.

"I lost the three best friends I had on the planet," Green said. "I'm never going to see them or talk to them again. There isn't one day I don't miss them, and that's never going to change... I still cry a lot, but you have two choices: You can move on or you can slowly rot and cause yourself more emotional pain than what you already feel... I'm choosing not to rot."

Ken was critically injured but needed multiple surgeries, ultimately having to get his leg amputated.

So could Ken Green ever play golf again? YEP!

Green asked his doctor about golf right away. It went like this, "That conversation was pretty brief... the doctor said the leg could be saved, but it'd be nothing more than a fixture. I'd walk, but that's about all. He said I could play golf, but I wouldn't be any good."

So Green asked, "What if you cut it off?"

"You could get a prosthesis and play," was the answer.

"I told him, 'Chop it!' " Green said. "I think I made it easier for them, because it was obvious they thought it was the best thing to do. If you get a patient who's reluctant, it presents a whole different set of problems."

Ken went through rehab, Peter Kostis has been working with him to get his swing back, and he's on his way to recovery.

Then, in January 2010, tragedy struck again...

The worst nightmare any parent could ever have. Ken's son Hunter passed away at college. I'm not going to get into details of that here, and I'm not going to talk about his nasty ex-wife who made this situation very difficult on Ken.

What I will say is this: Ken Green is one strong, resilient man. He will make it back on the Champions Tour, and he will succeed. With every fairway he hits, with every putt he drains - Billy, Jeanne, Nip and Hunter will be watching from above.

But here's the thing, Ken needs financial support from friends, family, and the golf community to get back on tour. As you may know, it's not cheap traveling the country, paying entry fees, food, etc...

Yet, there's a simple way we can support Ken Green's comeback. All it takes is $30 and you'll get one of these sweet hats in return:


All proceeds from the sale of these hats is donated directly to the Ken Green Living Expenses Trust.

To support Ken as he continues his comeback, just CLICK HERE and get a great looking hat and support this remarkable man.

He's been through more in the last few years than any man should have to go through in a lifetime.

If you really want to see firsthand what a good person he is, I recommend you read Ken Green's blog.

Thanks,
Larry

P.S. Ken is good friends with my brother-in-law Del and I often get to hear some very cool stories about what a good guy he truly is.

P.P.S. Just to show you what a fun guy Ken Green is here's a great story: When paired with Arnold Palmer at the 1997 Masters, Green had a pal bring him a beer on the 15th hole so he could always have a story to tell about having a beer with The King.

February 03, 2010

A Special Message To Clay Aiken Fans

I've got to tell ya, all of you Clay Aiken fans shocked me.

You see, last night, after putting my kids to bed I decided to write a brief article about Clay Aiken and the National Inclusion Project golf tournament.

Why?

Because this is a golf blog, the tournament is held down the road from my house, I've played the Mirasol golf course several times and this charity seems like a really good cause.

To me, it was no big deal, I was just making an observation about a celebrity - who until today I only knew as the guy who came in second place to Ruben Studdard (not sure where he is now).

But you people, you Clay Aiken fans - you blew me away.

Here's why...

This morning when I got up and checked this little golf blogs logs - I was astonished at what I saw.

What did I see? Glad you asked... I saw a staggering amount of visitors from websites I never knew existed. For instance:
  • theclayboard.yuku.com
  • theclackhouse.com
  • clayaikentheidealidol.com
  • chexxxysplace.com
  • clayversity.net
  • forums.clayonline.com
So, I visited these sites and wanted to see what the heck was going on. And you know what I found. I found heartfelt comments like these:
"Nice work, Larry. We need more people like you, who actually look at facts and judge someone by their actions."
"What a very nice mention for The Project by a non-fan."

"THAT was a nice surprise!!!"

"It is nice to see someone get what we have know all along! Great blog!!"

"Just fun reading this blog.....wonder if Clay has ever attempted to golf after seeing all having fun!? Great that this golfer "gets it"!"

"I liked that a lot. I posted it to fb so my family could read it."

"Thanks for posting this. These are the people we need to reach-the fans know what Clay is doing-this is wonderful and reaches out to a whole new audience."
To be honest, I had no idea Clay had so many fans and that so many people really believe in him, and his cause - the National Inclusion Project.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that all of your comments and the over 2,000 visitors (and counting) who came to this golf blog simply because I mentioned Clay Aiken - really struck a chord with me.

So, here's what I decided to do...

First, over on the right side of my blog you'll see I've added a National Inclusion Project banner ad. That way my readers will become aware of this cause, check it out and hopefully make a donation.

Next, I'm going to download a couple of Clay's songs from iTunes to check his music out. I'm willing to listen with an open ear. Please add comments to this post with suggestions.

And finally, if someone could email me (my email address is on the top right of your screen) next year, one month before the Inclusion tournament - I'm going to post a brief write-up on the tournament and encourage my readers to attend... Plus, I'll contact my fellow golf bloggers and ask them to do the same.

Again, thank you all for your kind words.
Larry

P.S. On one of the forums someone wrote "A Nice Blog From A NJU About Clay Who Was At GFI." My questions is: What does 'NJU' stand for?

February 02, 2010

Clay Aiken's National Inclusion Project Golf Tournament

I'll tell ya this - I never, ever thought I'd be writing about Clay Aiken here on my golf blog.

But yesterday, at Mirasol Golf Club (which is about 3 miles from my house) was the third annual golf event to benefit the National Inclusion Project.

Golf pro Wayne Player (whose son played on my sons flag football team this year, and I'll brag for a second - they went undefeated) has been helping Clay Aiken with his golf game for 3 years and at the pre-tourney clinics... as Aiken mentioned - he has no game.

Here it is in his own words, “I still don’t know anything... We do the clinic and I still don’t know what (Player) is talking about. I just stand there and make a few jokes.”


So why am I writing about Aiken here?

Because I really believe in his cause. It's called The National Inclusion Project and he has created a curriculum that can be used by already-existing camps to make their facilities accessible and fun for would-be campers with disabilities.

In short, the Project puts it like this: What would you do if it were your child who couldn't participate?

Frankly, I don't know what I would do. But I do know this: Although I've never been much of a fan of Clay Aiken, I now respect him as a person and admire the work he's doing for children.

For the 3rd year, N.I.P. has donated $15,000 to a Florida camp – this year the money went to the Florida Lion’s Camp in Lake Wales.

It's nice to see a celebrity put his name and valuable time to good use. Nice work Clay Aiken.

January 31, 2010

Black Women's Champ Ethel Funches Dies

At a time when black golfers were not welcome at country clubs and whites-only professional tournaments. They played in something called the United Golfers Association, a black golf league that started back in the 1920s.

The women who played in the UGA didn't get to play for money, they played for pride. And Mrs. Ethel P. Funches won more UGA championships than anyone in history.

Ethel Funches, center, at a trophy presentation in 1953.

As Levelle "Reds" Anderson, 94, who played at Langston Golf Course in Northeast Washington for decades put it, "She used to whip all the other women."

Legend has it among old-time golfers that Funches occasionally beat men, too: One such whipping occurred against a man who disliked female golfers, apparently she had a string of five consecutive birdies and shot a 1 under par. And she shut him up (hopefully forever).

The South Carolina native learned to play after marrying Eugene Funches, an elevator attendant at the National Geographic Society. He played golf, and she quickly learned.

Mrs. Funches joined the Wake Robin Golf Club, in the early 1940s. This club may be the oldest black women's golf club in the country. In 1963, the first black woman, Althea Gibson, went on the LPGA Tour. A woman that Funches had beat a couple years earlier in the quarterfinals of a tournament.

Funches did not have the money needed to go on the LPGA Tour and by the time Gibson had gone on tour Funches was already 50 years old. Ethel stopped playing golf in 1996 after the passing of her husband.

Ethel Funches passed away on January 6, 2010 at the age of 96.

I can only imagine how difficult it was for a black woman to play golf, and become so competitive during the time period she played. All I can say is that from what I have read - she was an incredible woman.

Tom Watson Rips Tiger Woods A New One

About time a fellow golfer starts saying what PGA Tour players are really thinking about Tiger Woods.

And who better than Tom Watson. The same golfer who:

In 1983 accused Gary Player of cheating in a Skins Game...

In 1993 criticized the GREAT Bill Murray for his zany antics at the Pebble Beach Pro Am...

In 1994 complained to Masters Officials about Gary McCord after he said "The greens were so fast they seemed to have been bikini-waxed and had body bags underneath." Resulting in McCord being removed from CBS coverage.

And now in 2010, Watson says Tiger's "transgression are 'bad for our game' - and he declares that Woods needs to work on his course 'manners' and get 'his personal life in order.'

As Watson put it, "His swearing and his club throwing, that should end. That's not part of what we want to project as far as the professional golf tour is concerned... It's something he needs to get control of and a handle on and show some humility to the public when he comes back."

I think its great that Tom Watson speaks his mind. Athletes in other sports are quite open and communicative about what they are thinking, why shouldn't golfers?

BUT, there is a factoid that perhaps Watson should remember when he opens his mouth. Back in 1997 when his wife filed for divorce he responded to questions by saying "I don't want to discuss that. It is a private thing."

I think Tom just needs to find a happy medium... and here it is: Feel free to rip Tiger Woods a new one for his on course antics, but leave him alone when it comes to his personal life.

January 28, 2010

Duquesne Dukes Drop Golf

Duquesne University is dropping men’s golf from its athletic roster after the spring season. In fact, it's restructuring its entire athletic department.

Not only is Duquesne nixing golf, but the Atlantic 10 Conference member, is also cutting the baseball, men’s swimming and wrestling programs.

This will leave the school with 16 varsity sports – seven men's and nine women’s – which is just one more than the NCAA Division I minimum for membership.

In all, 70 student-athletes and five coaches, including sixth-year men’s golf coach Tom Farrell will be affected by this piss-poor decision.

In short, this will save the university $1 million-plus annually, the schools athletic supporter director Greg Amodio said.

As Amodio put it, “This action is in no way meant to diminish the dedication, effort or ability of these fine student-athletes, coaches and alumni... They have contributed greatly to Duquesne athletics and to the vitality and history of the university.’’

I think this is an OUTRAGE. Seriously, a Division I school with no golf or baseball team. I don't get how anyone can think this is good for the school...

How do the MORON'S who are making decisions at Dusquesne University decide that keeping women's Lacrosse and a women's Rowing team makes more sense than men's baseball and golf?

The school's website boasts about how it was founded in 1878 and that there are over 79,000 alumni, blah, blah, blah... but yet they can't find the money for athletics?

With a $10.8 million budget I'm shocked this is happening... or that no alumni has stood up and said "WTF is going on here?"

Shame on all you jabroni's who made the decision to get rid of golf (and baseball) at Dusquesne University.

New Winn Grips for 2010

I just found a BIG sale on Winn Grips over at Hireko Golf.

They've got all the new grips in stock. Including: WinnLiteFirm™, WinnLiteMedium™, and WinnLiteSoft™ in all different sizes and firmness depending on your needs.



If you're looking to significantly reduce grip weight, increase club swing speed, generate greater distance and have more accuracy - Winn Grips may be right for you.

January 27, 2010

A Biodegradable Golf Ball? Yep!

Did you know that the Danish Golf Union recently figured out that it takes between 100 to 1,000 years for a golf ball to decompose naturally?

Not sure how they nailed such a specific time frame, but they did. Imagine being able to narrow it down to a tiny 900 year gap. The Danes are something I tell ya.

Considering us hackers in the United States lose an estimated 300 million golf balls each year – that’s a lotta balls, in a lotta lakes… for a lotta time.

But have no fear, help is on the way…

It’s called the "Ecobioball."

This biodegradable golf ball has an outer layer made of a recyclable plastic polymer and it degrades completely within 48 hours.

So what does it degrade into? Fish Food, of course. See the happy (and well-fed) goldfish below:



It slowly releases a high quantity of the heavy metal zinc as it disintegrates in any pond, river or lake that was fortunate enough to swallow your ball and cause you to curse like an angry sailor.

This nifty little golf ball is the brainchild of Albert Buscato, CEO of Albus Golf.

Buscato has spent over a year (and a boatload of money no doubt) working with a Spanish laboratory to determine the best option for a biodegradable golf ball.

When did he first come up with the idea for a biodegradable golf ball?

I’ll let Buscato tell you, "I was on a cruise several years ago and was frustrated not to be able to play golf… cruise lines have alternative ways for passengers to practice their swing, like in cabins with video simulators or netted cages, but I thought, 'we should be able to do the real thing’… I thought it would be fun to be able to practice golf without damaging the environment and by returning the favor… [with] a ball that not only does not pollute the waters, but also gives something back."

Since these are single-use balls, they will not cost as much as the regular golf balls we spend so much darn money on. Buscato is confident these "goldfish-friendly" balls will be a hit with golfers.

But here’s the problem, at just 50.5 grams, the golf balls are lighter than the average ball.

This means they won’t go as far when not into water.

Will biodegradable golf balls become the rage? Are golfers going to stop playing HV1’s and start hitting fish-food balls? Are the fish of the world going to get too fat?

I don’t have the answers. I wish I did, but I don’t. Only time will tell.

January 26, 2010

Fore! Plane Lands On Hermann Park Golf Course

Pilot, Brendon Ford, ran out of fuel while flying a plane home to Columbus, Texas.

So what's a pilot to do? Land on a golf course, of course.

And that's exactly what Ford did. He made an emergency landing of the single-engine Cessna plane right onto the 11th fairway of Hermann Park Golf Course in Houston, TX.

Here's the story:
 
Ford told a local news station that, he couldn't make it to Hobby Airport and that he first thought about landing at a football field he spotted, but instead he opted for the golf course. I'm sure members of Hermann Oaks are thrilled with his decision.

Apparently he only saw one golfer on the 11th fairway, which is why he chose the 11th hole. I wonder if he yelled "FORE" as he was landing... or if the guy got to finish the hole.

January 25, 2010

Tiger Woods' New Sponsor's "Unofficial" Press Release

As PGA TV viewership continues to plummet and corporate sponsorship also nose dives - because of Tiger Woods recent "transgressions"... the golfing elite at PGA Headquarters have been quietly negotiating with several companies expressing an interest in filling the void.

Narrowly beating out "Tiagra... good for 18 holes! The successful bidder expressed their enthusiasm of trying to live up to their corporate image and melding that with Tiger's zeal for golf.

Today, at a joint press release with Tiger Woods and the new corporate sponsor, the PGA announced their new choice.

January 23, 2010

Cher Sells 'House' on Hualalai Golf Course

HOLY SH!T! Hey Cher, "This isn't a house... it's a picture-perfect mansion in paradise." And it just sold for only $8.7 million.

So what exactly does $8.7 million get you these days? It gets you...

A six-bedroom, 8,800-square-foot Balinese style residence featuring a gated center courtyard leading to the main residence. In the main residence there's a master wing, great room, kitchen, dining room, outdoor living area, infinity pool and a spa overlooking the Hualalai Golf Course.

I know that sounds like a lot of money, but this beyotch looks worth it to me:


As I mentioned, it has a killer view of the ocean and it also sits on the amazing Hualalai Golf Course.

This golf course happens to be the first Jack Nicklaus design on Hawaii, it's built in the lava fields of Ka‘upulehu, and it's the home of the PGA Champions Tour's - Mitsubishi Electric Championship at Hualalai event. What more could you really want?

If I had only known it was available I would have put in an offer. Right!

January 22, 2010

Jim Thorpe is Going to Prison! Did He Break a Window & Run? Not Quite...

60-year-old golfer Jim Thorpe, a three-time winner on the US PGA Tour, is going to prison.

Why? You ask... Well apparently Thorpe "forgot" to pay taxes on more than $2 million smackers in income. Whoops!



Thorpe must turn himself in to authorities by April 1 for his one year stint.

Thorpe has won 13 times on the Champions Tour, was also the recipient of two years of supervised release and 200 hours of community service. Too bad, so sad. And while he's on supervised release, he'll have to try to pay back money he owes.

Interesting Jim Thorpe factoid: He's one of 12 children and the son of a golf course superintendent.

If Jim is lucky they'll have a golf team at camp prison. That's what you get when you avoid Mr. Taxman. Shame on you Jim Thorpe. You're making us taxpaying golfers look bad, oh wait a minute - Tiger Woods already did that.

January 21, 2010

"I've Been With Tiger" Signs Crack Me Up!

It's good to see that golf fans from Down Under find the "Tiger-Gate" Scandal as humorous as I do:



This photo was taken during the fourth round of the 2010 Australian Open at Melbourne Park on January 21, 2010 in Melbourne, Australia.

I love the Pimp hat... kinda reminds me of Huggie Bear from Starsky & Hutch.

Jack Nicklaus Turns 70

Today, the Golden Bear turns 70.

Living in Jupiter, FL I see Jack Nicklaus a few times a year at his grandkids sporting events. I have boys who are the same age as Steve's kids. Sometimes I see Jack and Barbara at a Jupiter Mustangs football game, other times it's in the crowded Jupiter Community Center gym for a basketball game.

But here's the thing, even as he gets older (and yes, he is starting to look his age) he will always be a hero to me. This man did amazing things on the golf course and he's always been a true ambassador for the game.

It seems like just yesterday I was watching Nicklaus win his final Masters. So hard to believe that it was almost 24 years ago.

With that, I'll leave you with 18 interesting facts about Jack Nicklaus from this article courtesy of a Daytona Beach newspaper:

1. When Jack was growing up in Columbus, Ohio, he excelled at a variety of sports, and if not for an astounding golf skill that landed him a scholarship at Ohio State, he likely would've played college basketball.

2. Jack's father, Charlie, played football at Ohio State. Charlie became a pharmacist after graduation but continued in sports, playing semi-pro football and winning local tennis championships. Charlie also became close friends with legendary Ohio State coach Woody Hayes, who, upon watching Jack play golf, convinced Charlie to keep the boy far away from a football field.

3. Jack's grandson, Nick O'Leary, just completed his junior season at Palm Beach Dwyer High School. He's considered Florida's top tight-end prospect for the class of 2011. Jack's son, Steve, played football at Florida State in the early '80s.

4. Jack said he reported to Ohio State in 1958 at 175 pounds, but fraternity fun added nearly 50 pounds in his first semester. "I tried to drink all the beer in Columbus, then I found out they just kept making more," he once told Golf Digest magazine.

5. In 1978, Jack, an avid fisherman inshore and off, caught a 1,358-pound black marlin off the coast of Australia. Later that week, he won the Australian Open by six shots.

6. During the 1970s, when Jack was in his 30s, he won eight of his 18 professional major titles. In 40 majors played during the decade, he finished outside the top 10 just five times (never worse than fifth in the British Opens of the '70s).

7. When Jack turned 50 in 1990, he suggested he wouldn't play many Senior Tour events. For each week he stayed away, Lee Trevino sent Jack's wife Barbara a bouquet of flowers.

8. Trevino's desire to keep Jack away was well founded. In the first eight Senior Tour majors Jack played, in 1990-91, he won five of them. Overall, he won eight Senior majors. Throw in his two U.S. Amateurs, and that's 28 total majors.

9. An Australian golf writer named Don Lawrence first referred to Nicklaus as the "Golden Bear" in a 1963 article. Jack certainly liked that better than the "Fat Jack" label many put on him -- he was also self-conscious about his high-pitched voice, so he liked the manly imagery. It also fit because in high school Jack played for the Upper Arlington Golden Bears.

10. Charlie Nicklaus died of pancreatic cancer in 1970. Near the end, while being wheeled into the operating room on a gurney, Charlie looked at Jack and said, "Don't think it ain't been charming." Thirty-five years later, after Jack completed his final round at the Masters Tournament, he repeated that line to his son and caddy, Jackie.

11. Charlie Nicklaus once followed Bobby Jones during one of Jones' major championships, and had hoped Jack would follow in Jones' footsteps as a career amateur. Jack had planned to do that, and figured he'd follow Charlie's career path as a pharmacist, but by age 20 it became obvious there'd be more competition (and money) in the pro ranks.

12. If Ben Hogan's book, "Five Lessons: The Modern Fundamentals of Golf," is considered the bible of golf instruction, Jack's "Golf My Way" is probably a close second. The 1974 book is still selling (well over 2 million copies), and many modern stars -- including Ernie Els and Greg Norman -- credit the book for building their games as youngsters.

13. During halftime of the Ohio State-Minnesota football game in 2006, Jack became just the fifth non-band member ever to "Dot the I" for the Buckeye band.

14. Jack, a father of five, was always a regular at his kids' sporting events, and does the same now with the grandkids. During his prime golf years, he made a point of never playing more than two tournaments in a row in order to be home as often as possible.

15. Jack and Barbara built a home near their native Columbus in 1964. During construction, they spent the winter in South Florida. Jack's love for warm-weather activities (mostly tennis and fishing) won out, and by 1970, they moved to North Palm Beach, into a home where they still live.

16. Due to contractual obligations, Jack played MacGregor golf balls during his professional career. The balls were considered to be very weak, especially when compared to Titleist balls. "It shows how good he really was," said former USGA technical director Frank Thomas.

17. The most famous quote about Jack's game came at the 1965 Masters, where Bobby Jones said, "Nicklaus played a game with which I'm not familiar." But Tom Weiskopf may have best summed up Jack's competitive nature: "Jack knew he was going to beat you. You knew Jack was going to beat you. And Jack knew that you knew that he was going to beat you."

18. Jack and Barbara Nicklaus are celebrating Jack's 70th birthday on Christmas Island in the Indian Ocean. After a three-day fishing vacation, Jack will return to work with his course-design company.

P.S. Happy Birthday Mr. Nicklaus.... When can I play on the beautiful Bears Club you built near my house? :)

January 20, 2010

New Golfr Golf App For iPhone

Finally, a decent golf app for the iPhone and iTouch that's free!

It's called Golfr and its a directory of golf courses... it currently has 15,000 that you can access.

You can use Golfr to search and browse courses by name or location. Plus, you can use it to get the distance and par for each hole, get course ratings and slopes... compare green fees (standard, weekday, twilight) and more come!

Once you find the course you want to play, Golfr makes it easy to call the course and book a tee time, get directions to the course with the iPhone’s mapping application, which is great for golfers who are traveling.

Here's a demo of the Golfr iPhone app:

Haiti's Petionville Club Becomes Refugee Camp

Petionville Golf Club, a little nine-holer, outside of Port-au-Prince, has become a a refugee camp manned by the 82nd Airborne Division... who passes out water, MREs (meals ready to eat) and high-protein biscuits near the ninth green.



Current estimates have over 10,000 people living on the course.

Petionville was built in the 1930s and how has around 300 members, and non-members can play for $30. The short course has no par 5s, and all the grasses are indigenous and self-sustaining.

As Bill Evans, an American who happens to be the general manager and golf club president put it, "On a typical day you're going to find caddies playing with members... it's not some snobby, elitist golf course."

Sounds like a nice place to play. Although I'm sure the golf course wouldn't meet the high standards us snobby Americans have... I occasionally enjoy a round at a modest, non-pretentious club more than at the fancy country clubs that are all over the place here in Palm Beach County.

May the people of Haiti remain strong, are able to rebuild soon and come back better than ever. My thoughts and prayers go out to all of you.

January 19, 2010

Will any fans go to the 2010 Bob Hope Classic?

The 2010 Bob Hope Classic, played at the Classic Club, is going to be one of the lamest events of the year. With the highest-ranked player in the field at No. 37, its lefty Mike Weir in case you were wondering, and no title sponsor - I wonder why they are even playing this week.

2005 Hope winner Justin Leonard will be on hand and so will John Merrick, who played well last week at the Sony Open. And former Hope champion (2006) Chad Campbell will be there too.

David Duval, and rookies Jamie Lovemark and Sam Saunders (Arnold Palmer's grandson) are all playing on sponsors exemptions. Rickie Fowler, Troy Merritt, and Graham DeLaet will also try to get a win under their belts.

Quite frankly, I think Wednesday's pro-am may be the highlight of the week. Bo Jackson, Evan Longoria, Greg Maddux, Dr. Phil McGraw, Kurt Russell, Alice Cooper and Vinny Testaverde will be on hand.

With rain in the forecast for the entire week - I don't see many golf fans heading to the Bob Hope Classic. It may be time to put this dog of a tournament out of its misery.

Chupacabra Spotted on Runaway Bay Golf Course in Texas

I think I've heard it all...

Runaway Bay Golf Course employee, Rocky Vincent, spotted something rather unusual near the back of the driving range. And quite frankly, I think it's best if I share what he saw in his own words:

"It was like a shaved weenie dog, with raccoon feet, a possum tail and a possum head... [It had] been inbred way too many times or something."

I couldn't have put it better myself. "A shaved weenie dog"... "inbred too many times or something"... what an eloquent interpretation.

Legend has it that an animal known as Chupacabra - also called (and I'm not kidding here) a 'goat sucker' - roams this area of Texas. Perhaps it's best if you listen to the locals share this incredible tale:

Who knew Texas has the amazing and greatly feared Chupacabra? I certainly didn't... it's definitely not as exciting or interesting as Big Foot, The Loch Ness Monster or the Abominable Snowman.

On the bright side, the folks who play golf at Runaway Bay Golf Course no longer have to live in fear of the dreaded Chupacabra. Phew!

January 18, 2010

Japanese Phenom Ryo Ishikawa

18 year-old Japanese phenom Ryo Ishikawa is making his 2010 PGA Tour debut on February 4 at the Northern Trust Open in Los Angeles at Riviera.

So who exactly is Ishikawa... and how good is he?

Well, Ishikawa won 4-times last year in Japan... and he became the youngest player to win a money list on a tour recognized by the world ranking. He also won 3 of 5 matches for the Presidents Cup team.

Yes, Ishikawa made his U.S. debut at Riviera last year and missed the cut. But get this, the amount of media nearly doubled last year at the Northern Trust Open.

I believe it. I remember when I worked at the TPC of Connecticut when Canon used to sponsor the tournament. The amount of media there was huge. It was like Wang from Caddyshack was everywhere you looked.

As for Ryo Ishikawa, who is currently ranked 30th in the world, he will also play in the Pebble Beach National Pro-Am and the Match Play Championship.

Is Tiger Woods Really Coming Back To Golf This Spring?

According to my favorite blog for celebrity trash-talk - Perez Hilton - Tiger Woods is returning to golf this spring.

Hmmm.... not a shocker there. I think everyone expects him to return to the links in time for The Masters. So for those of you who care, I don't anymore, looks like you'll get to see Tiger in April.

The Hacker's Guide

Today, I'm going to give a plug for a new golf guide. Not because I'll ever play any of the courses, but because of how thorough this sucker is.

Let me explain...

It's called The Hacker's Guide. This Minneapolis-based golf course rating group, has reviewed every eighteen-hole public golf course in Minnesota and western Wisconsin. That's 283 golf courses!



They use a 40-factor system in the Hacker's Guide so the same criteria is reviewed for each course. Team Hacker, as they call it, is comprised of over sixty course raters, who put courses through this proprietary ratings system.

In short, courses are rated on five primary categories: hospitality, playability, usability, facility and value. Plus, each course receives a 400-word review from "regular" golfers.

So if you live in Minnesota or Western Wisconsin I urge you get a copy of the Hacker's Guide right here. It's under $20 and well worth every penny.

The book will be available in February, 2010 and introduced at the 2010 Minnesota Golf Show and the 2010 Great LaCrosse Golf Show.

Demise of the Golf Writer?

I just stumbled on an interesting article by a guy across the 'pond' named Lawrence Donegan.

In short, Donegan writes that all newspapers used to have dedicated golf writers, but today only the New York Times and USA Today has one.

I know this is true, but I believe it's more for economic reasons than because of demand for golf-related articles. For instance, The Golf Channel (I know it's a tv station and not a print publication) runs 24-hours a day and it certainly isn't hurting for advertisers.

Which means it come down to what type of sports writing will sell more papers... and unfortunately it's baseball, football and basketball here in the States.

January 17, 2010

The Wave, Muscat Selects Greg Norman to Design Public Links Course

Oman’s first PGA Links golf course will be designed by Greg Norman at The Wave, Muscat. The golf course will be located in the heart of Muscat, the capital of Oman.

This 18-hole links-style course, will include a golf academy, driving range and floodlit par 3 practice facility. It is expected to fully open in 2011, with a 9-hole golf facility opening at the end of 2010.

This golf course is part of an effort in Oman to promote the development of golf and to make the country a more enticing travel destination. Good luck with that!

Check out all the countries Greg Norman Golf Course Design is currently working it right here. From Mexico to Spain to Vietnam to China... and of course Australia... Norman is all over the place.

Is he the most sought after golf course designer in the world? It looks like it to me.

January 16, 2010

PGA Tour Rookie Troy Merritt

With Rickie Fowler getting all the attention as the next new superstar on the PGA Tour - another tour rookie, Troy Merritt, is flying way under the radar.


How far under the radar? So far that his name was spelled wrong for the first hour of the Sony Open. The sign said 'Merrick.' As in John Merrick, who played in the OMEGA Mission Hills World Cup for the United States last year with Nick Watney.

As for Troy Merritt, he set an NCAA record winning five straight tournaments at Boise State, and last month he became only the third person since 1992 to go wire-to-wire at Q-school to earn his PGA TOUR card.

As for Merritt's credentials: At Winona State he won 12 tournaments in two years, then he transferred to Boise State and won nine times - including seven wins as a senior, a year where he led the NCAA in scoring. He also won on the Nationwide Tour in 2009.

Through two rounds at the Sony Open Merritt is faring much better than Rickie Fowler who did not make the cut. Merritt shot an opening round 65 and followed that up with a 71. As for John Merrick, he shot a 65 and 68.

Bizarre Golf Ball Injury Knocks New Zealander Tim Wilkinson Out of Sony Open

New Zealand golfer Tim Wilkinson suffered a bizarre injury when his golf ball ricocheted and nailed him in the shoulder.



On the eighth hole Wilkinson was trying to hit out of a ditch off the fairway. Unfortunately for him, the shot didn't go as planned... His ball hit a tree, came back and hit him in his collarbone. OUCH! Causing him to immediately withdraw from the Sony Open.

Wilkinson is currently the only New Zealander on the PGA tour. He was 173rd on 2009's PGA tour money list and he's currently ranked 311th in the world.

January 15, 2010

Former NBC Exec Ben Silverman Gets Engaged on Golf Course

Former NBC Executive Ben Silverman recently proposed to his girlfriend Jennifer Cuoco on the Indian Creek Country Club in greater Miami.


Is it me... or do you think the title of this picture could be "Beauty & the Beast" too?

Anyway, here's how it went down in her own words:

"He was super-romantic about all of it. We both love to golf, so he took me to Indian Creek Country Club ... I teed up and landed right on the green looking at a birdie putt. I was completely unaware that Ben had worked it out with the caddie to have the ring box placed in the cup. I ended up tapping in for a par, to find my golf ball drop on top of the ring box! I pulled it out and Ben, a true gentleman, went down on one knee and asked me to marry him. I started crying and of course said 'yes' as other golfers were applauding."

B.J. Upton Celebrity Golf Classic

Tampa Bay Devil Rays outfielder B.J. Upton is hosting the second B.J. Upton Celebrity Golf Classic tournament on January 25 at Tampa's Hunter's Green Country Club. The tournaments' goal is to raise money for the homeless in Tampa. The St. Vincent de Paul will be the beneficiary of the charity event.

It's rare these days to see celebrities give of themselves and help others. Too often we only hear about scandals, drugs, etc...

Here's how Upton puts it: "In the area where I live [in Tampa, Fla.], I see a lot of homeless people... That's kind of what triggered it for me. Seeing the guys under the bridge or the people standing at the stop signs asking for money made me want to do something to help the homeless. Obviously the situation in the Tampa Bay area is pretty significant."

If you're in the Tampa area and want to play in the tournament, you can call Latricia Goding at 757-532-8701 or 727-836-9702; she can also be reached via email at LaGoding@hotmail.com.

Good work B.J. Upton - I hope your golf tournament is a major success!

Review of Renegade Mental Golf - Golf Psychology Program

Don't buy the Renegade Mental Golf program until you read this review.

For anyone who has played golf for more than a year, by now you've figured out that golf is more mental than it is physical. At the level I play at, I'd say it's about 90% mental now. After 30 years or so, my swing is very consistent - but the outcome isn't. Why? Because my mind messes me up and causes me to do stupid things.

Now let's take a look at the Renegade Mental Golf and Golf Psychology program...

The program was developed by Stephen Ladd and Bill Gladwell. So are they qualified to give us a golf psychology lesson? Let's see...

Together they have over 37 years of intense personal and professional study into the mind-body connection. They have four academic degrees, dozens of internships with the most respected authorities in the sports and personal change arenas, and extensive travel throughout southeast Asia in search of more substantial (and perhaps lesser known) answers to the question of which techniques champion athletes use to gain a mental edge over opponents.

So what can the Renegade Mental Golf program do for you?  It will help you...

"Hit Booming, Jaw-Dropping Drives From The Very First Tee... Stick It Close To The Pin... And Ruthlessly Slash Strokes From Your Handicap...”

Plus it promises to show you:
  • Why most golfers NEVER reach their true potential! (Here's a hint: hard work has nothing to do with this!)
  • Why practice does NOT make perfect
  • How to improve any specific area of your game... in 45 seconds
  • Discover the amazingly simple strategies developed by a Stanford Engineer to help war veterans overcome post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)... and how to use these same tools to shave strokes off your game... Instantly!
  • Why traditional positive thinking actually hurts your game... and what to do instead
  • How to eliminate tension on the tee box... especially the dreaded first tee... automatically
  • CRUSH that first drive long and straight... and set the tone for the entire round
  • How to enter "the zone" at will... and stay there
  • How to quickly eliminate negative swing thoughts that kill your game
  • Drain putts with obnoxious confidence - your friends may start to actually hate you (but I'll bet you get over it)
  • How to eliminate fear and doubt, no matter how tight the fairway or ominous the water hazard
  • How to play to your true potential
A lot of big promises, I agree, but if you believe this program will work for you - it can and will work for you. Over 14,000 fellow golfers have already used Ladd and Gladwell's system.

It's certainly cheaper than going to a sports psychologist to figure out why you have the yips.

In short, Renegade Mental Golf costs just $57, that's less than the price of an hour golf lesson, and has a 100% risk-free guarantee with it. You have absolutely nothing to lose if you decide to check it out.

Visit Renegade Mental Golf's website right here

Is Rickie Fowler the Next Tiger Woods?

Leonardo DiCaprio look-a-like Rickie Fowler is starting his first full season the PGA Tour this week at the Sony Open in Hawaii. His first round 75 is probably not indicative of what he's capable of doing out there.

You see, so far Fowler has been a standout at every level in golf. From the junior golf ranks to high school to two All-American years at Oklahoma State to two Walker Cups. Plus, he's already had some success in the pro ranks, losing in playoffs in a Nationwide Tour and PGA Tour event last year, then getting through the final stage of Q School to earn his PGA Tour card.

So is he destined to save the PGA Tour in 2010 and become the next Tiger Woods? Ya never know.

I like the 21 year-old Fowler because of his down-to-earth attitude. As he put it, "I'm not exactly the traditional golfer... I didn't grow up at a country club. I'm just a kid that grew up at a driving range (who) used to beat buckets of balls."

Good luck to Rickie Fowler on the PGA Tour... may you have a breakout first year!

Natalie Gulbis Hits Fan with a Sand Wedge

Even though this video is most likely a fake... it's good to see that Natalie Gulbis has a good sense of humor. Check it out as she hits a sand wedge from 55 yards and supposedly nails a fan sleeping on the bleachers.

Do you think Gulbis really hit him? Do you think this is a setup? Let me know...

History of Golf by Robin Williams

Here's a great video by Robin Williams on the history of golf. It's brilliant! Enjoy...

Bat Caddy Launching New Remote Controlled Electric Golf Push Cart

Electric golf push carts have been around for about 20 years. I remember having PowaKaddy's when I was in high school working at the TPC River Highlands although at the time it was the TPC of Connecticut.

But they've come a long way... and the new Bat Caddy models are proof. Its like having your own robot out there on the golf course with you. Check it out:



So if you're tired of renting golf carts, or getting to old to carry your golf bag - the new Bat-Caddy electric motorized golf push caddy cart may be the perfect just what you need.

Ah, but how much do they cost? Not as much as you'd think. Bat Caddy is actually having a sale right now and you can pick up one for between $395 and $695. When you think about how much you spend renting golf carts over the course of just one season, it practically pays for itself.

January 14, 2010

Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10 Video Game

I love it! EA Sports is releasing Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10. Good for them for sticking with their man.

But what's funny about this game is its tagline: "Feel the drama"

Ummm... Is this a golf game or does it take you into Tiger's personal life?

You can check out Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10 here.

The Stone Eagle Golf Club Foreclosure Sale

Palm Desert is becoming America's capitol for bankrupt and foreclosed golf courses. The Stone Eagle Golf Club is the latest victim.

Pacific Western Bank held a foreclosure sale and the bank is now the proud owner. Although rumor has it this was a "friendly" foreclosure and the golf clubs' members are going to try to buy it.

The golf course remains open and operating... its 700 acres look beautiful. If you're in the area it's off Highway 74 in Palm Desert, CA - go play there, maybe it'll be able to stay open.

A Shady Deal at Rolling Knolls Country Club

Cook County has agreed to buy Rolling Knolls Country Club. Normally, a deal like this is not news.

But the fact that Cook County bought Rolling Knolls Country Club - in Elgin,IL, a suburb of Chicago - from the family of Thomas Schneider, the Commissioner of Cook County makes it news.

It sounds like something fishy is going on there to me. Don't ya think? I wonder if Al Capone's "family" is still doing business there.

Ever See a Tiger Shark?

Here's proof Tiger Sharks really exist:


January 13, 2010

The Simple Golf Swing by David Nevogt

Have you heard of The Simple Golf Swing by David Nevogt yet?

No worries if you haven't... I'm going to give you a quick rundown of how it can improve your golf game in under 60 days.

In short, David Nevogt, is a golf writer and a heck of a golfer. He's developed a proven system that any golfer looking to improve his game should seriously consider getting. Heck, it only costs about the price of a dozen HV1 balls.

For instance, The Simple Golf Swing can:
  • Help you hit the ball straighter
  • Help you hit with greater distance
  • Help you hit with more accuracy (every time)
  • Help you hit more greens... and stick the ball closes to the pin
  • Help you eliminate your slice
  • Help you gain more confidence in your swing and game
How will he help you do this? With a simple to use proven system that really works! Geez, if it can help you with just one of these things - it's worth every penny & then some.

The best part: You'll become a better golfer fast! How fast? Let me tell you...
  • You'll learn "The Simple Golf Swing" in 3 hours
  • You'll lower your score by 7 strokes (or more) within your first 36 holes
  • You'll drop 12 strokes off your handicap after just 2 weeks.
Bottom line, David Nevogt, and his proven Simple Golf Swing system will totally transform your game - FAST.

Imagine the look on your golfing buddies faces when you start schooling them with ease and taking all their money.

In short, Nevogt's primary goal is to get you breaking 80 within 2 months... no matter what you're shooting right now.

The premise of his system, that will help you create a correct swing plane, is using your spine as an axis. What this does is keeps all of your swings consistent. And with a consistent, correct swing - you will begin lowering your score.

What's great about this system is that it's not limited to swing planes. He also shows you the proper grip so you can add distance to your shots... and he shows you how to get your timing and club face alignment perfect so the ball flies straight as a laser beam nearly every time.

Kiss your hook or nasty slice goodbye forever... and start lowering your score right away. Simply follow David Nevogt's step-by-step guide with easy-to-follow instructions and detailed photos.

Simple click here for full details on The Simple Golf Swing.

East Kilbride Golf Course Clubhouse Destroyed in Fire

Fire sucks! Especially when it destroys the clubhouse of the golf club you play.

And unfortunately, the folks who play at East Kilbride Golf Club in south Lanarkshire know this feeling too well. See picture below of the remnants of their clubhouse:



But this fire sucks even more for Club Steward Duncan McSporran. That's because his home was attached to the clubhouse. And it too was destroyed by the fire.

On the bright side, I'm sure they'll have a makeshift clubhouse up fast... and a much nicer one will be built to replace it. Good luck folks.

Kings of Leon: The Golfers?

The Nashville rock & rollers, Kings of Leon, are apparently obsessed with golf.


Just how obsessed are Kings of Leon with golf? These guys are so obsessed with golf that they are taking all of 2010 off to improve their games.

As drummer Nathan Followill put it, “I’m going to sit on my couch and cry tears of joy sitting in my pants with a tub of Famous Amos chocolate chip cookie ice cream. Then it’s onto the golf course, a bit of fishing and some camping in the wild.”

As one source reports, “They love golf, they can’t get enough of it. Nathan is a brilliant player but Caleb is having a good go and snapping at his heels... Everyone hopes they will have another album out this year but they’re in no rush. They are really enjoying life away from the studio.”

Wouldn't it be nice to have enough money - like the guys in Kings of Leon do - to take an entire year off to do nothing but perfect your golf game? I think so too.

January 12, 2010

My Favorite Golf Partner


Today, is my favorite golf partners' 98th birthday. And although my grandfather, Bernie Fields, isn't with us any more... every year on January 12, I miss him a little more than usual.

You see, my grandfather was more than a grandparent, he was my best friend. And we formed this strong bond playing golf together. Usually at Portland Golf Course in the town I grew up in, Portland, CT.

But here's what's unusual about us becoming so close on the golf course: Gramps had really bad asthma. Yet the moment he stepped on a golf course - it disappeared! It was magical really. Imagine having severe asthma and finding sanctuary on a golf course.

And although many people knew my grandfather because of his jewelry store on Main Street in Middletown, CT.... what most people didn't know is that Bernie Fields was a very generous person. Now when I say generous, I don't necessarily mean just with money. I say generous because he also gave back so much of his precious time to the local community, especially when it involved children.

For example, he founded the first Big Brothers organization in CT. It's called Nutmeg Big Brothers Big Sisters, and he started the Ahern Whalen baseball tournament. Both are still going strong because of Bernie.

In 1980, he was recognized for all of his hard work with the Middlesex County Chamber of Commerce Distinguished Citizen Award in Cromwell, CT at the old Lord Cromwell hotel. I was just 11 years-old at the time, but I remember the event well. Any time an 11 year-old has to put on a jacket and tie, it's remembered.

But what I remember most about the event was seeing Gramps up on the podium. I clearly remember thinking that this man is larger than life. And to this day, I believe that he really was.

If I accomplish and do half the great things he did in his lifetime, my life will be a major success.
 
With that, I'd like to tell my favorite golf partner: "Happy Birthday! I Miss You."

Top 5 Golf Courses on Oahu, Hawaii

Sports editor of the Honolulu Star-Bulletin, Paul Arnett, recently put together a "Top 5" list of the best golf courses to play in Oahu, Hawaii.

Here's his list of the top 5 golf courses in Oahu(in order):

  1. Makaha Resort and Golf Club (West Course)
  2. Koolau Golf Club
  3. Waialae Country Club
  4. Ko Olina Golf Club
  5. Turtle Bay Resort (Palmer Course)    
Now No Three Putts has not been to any of these golf courses, but I do know a thing or two about lists like this. They are heavily skewed towards golfers with unlimited financial resources.

As one reader of the article with Arnett's list pointed out, “Your selection was o.k., but for the average man, with money considerations, there is a wonderful, beautiful course nestled between Luana Hills and Koolau. The Pali Municipal G.C. ”

So there you have it. If you've got the money to spend - the five golf courses listed above sound like they'd be great choices... if money is an issue, ya might wanna check out The Pali Municipal Golf Course. Aloha!

Greg Norman & Chris Evert Get Divorced

Chris Evert, 55, and Greg Norman, 54, were married in the Bahamas in June of 2008... and after separating just 15 months later, they secretly finalized their divorce in early December.



And with the Tiger Woods scandal(s) breaking just days earlier - the timing to keep news of the divorce quiet and away from mainstream media couldn't have been better.

According to my local rag, the Palm Beach Post, Evert and Norman finalized the divorce paperwork in Key West, FL, on Dec. 8, 2009.

The Post says Evert and Norman have agreed to stick to their pre-nuptial agreement, and no money changed hands as part of the settlement.

Fort Scott Country Club and Golf Course Listed For Sale on Craigslist.com

If you've got an extra $925,000 in the bank and you'd like to buy a golf course and hunting lodge - now's your chance.

Although Pat Carney, the owner of the Fort Scott Country Club & Golf Course, in Fort Scott, Kansas, won't admit that he's selling his golf club... the following ad on Craigslist.com is a dead giveaway that he is:

18 HOLE GOLF COURSE & HUNTING LODGE - $925000 (FORT SCOTT, KS)

18 HOLE GOLF COURSE
6000 SQ FT CLUB HOUSE WITH RESTAURANT & BAR + UPSTAIRS APARTMENT
MAINTENANCE BUILDINGS + CART SHED BUILDING WITH 20 CARTS (2005-2009 YAMAHA)
166 ACRES WITH 4 PONDS WITH FISH + DEER & TURKEY
ALL EQUIPMENT - FAIRWAY MOWER, GREENS MOWER, ZERO TURN MOWER, ROUGH MOWER, TEE/COLLAR MOWER, 15' BATWING, TRACTOR, SPRAY RIG, TOP DRESSER, UTILITY CARTS, ETC.
IRRIGATION SYSTEM
SWIMMING POOL
TENNIS COURTS
MAKE OFFER OWNER WANTS TO RETIRE.
LAND AND BUILDINGS WORTH MORE THAN ASKING PRICE.

PRICE REDUCED - OWNER RETIRING - MUST SELL

So if you're interested in buying a golf course here's a link to the Craigslist ad so you can inquire about Fort Scott Country Club and Gof Course.

January 11, 2010

Review: Callaway Golf Diablo Edge & Diablo Forged Irons

Callaway is the first of the big golf club manufacturers to announce its new line of clubs for 2010. The line is called Diablo Edge Irons and will be available January 15. The Diablo Forged Irons are coming to a retail store near you on February 15.

Diablo Edge Irons feature a bigger sweet spot that's where most amateurs commonly hit the ball on the clubface. They do this with a lower, deeper center of gravity. Which results in a longer, more consistent distance and better accuracy.

They also have a "Solid Impact Sole" that delivers a smoother interaction with grass and is designed to lessen the effects of heavy and thin shots. By improving the impact location on the club face you can expect greater distance.

COST: The Diablo Forged Irons (available on February 15) retail for $999 for steel-shafted sets, and $1199 for graphite-shafted sets.

The Diablo Edge Irons (available on January 15) will retail for $599 for a steel-shafted set. The Diablo Edge Irons will also be available in combo sets, featuring six irons and two Diablo Edge Hybrids. The combo set with two graphite-shafted hybrids and six steel-shafted irons will retail for $699. The combo set with two graphite-shafted hybrids and six graphite-shafted irons will retail for $799.

For full details simply click here: Callaway Golf Diablo irons.

Don't Commit Suicide on a Golf Course, PLEASE!

Some jabroni decided to kill himself on the 10th hole of the Island Country Club on Marco Island, FL on New Year's morning.

The man's body was discovered by golf course maintenance with a gun in his hand, Marco Island Police Department reported.

Was he a frustrated golfer? Did he have a bad round earlier that day? Or did he lose a bundle of money on the course that day? I don't know, and frankly I don't care.

I just know that if you're going to commit suicide, do it in the privacy of your own home or car... don't leave your rotting carcass on a golf course.

New Gatorade "UnFaithful" Tiger Woods Sports Drink

Gatorade bottles are showing up in Denver area stores with a label that has an image of Tiger Woods, with his wife Elin, and a one word logo that simply says "Unfaithful."

Jason Kay of Longmont, Colo., claims he and a friend pulled off this "pop art" project to create a buzz. Kay says that 1,000 of these "Unfaithful" Gatorade bottles were secretly placed in stores from Longmont to Denver.

Here's the report from KUSA TV:


The bad news for Kay and his "partner in crime": The FDA's Office of Criminal Investigations is taking this seriously. Even if the drink is uncontaminated, they could face a federal tampering charge.

January 10, 2010

Hireko Custom Golf Clubs

If you're looking for custom golf clubs, but don't want to pay the cost normally associated with custom clubs - custom fitted Hireko Golf Clubs are a great option.

They are recommended in the "Best Values" section in the 2009 Golf Digest Hot List Issue... and they consistently get 5 star ratings from golfers who use their clubs.

Hireko offers high quality custom-fit golf clubs, hybrids, fairway woods, drivers, putters, irons, wedges, junior golf clubs, golf club components, club assembly tools and golf accessories direct consumers. Hireko and Dynacraft International market the following brands Acer, Avatar, Power Play, Prophet, Synchron, Genesis, Oxygen, Pal Joey and iBella.

If you have any interest in getting custom fit golf clubs - I strongly urge you to check out: HirekoGolf.com – Custom Fit Golf Clubs At Discount Prices... with Free Online Club Fitting - when you shop around.

Hank Haney & Charles Barkley on Saturday Night Live

Whether you like Charles Barkley or not, you've gotta give him some credit for having a good sense of humor about his golf swing. A swing that even golf teaching guru Hank Haney can't fix.

Here's a clip from SNL as Charles Barkley and Hank Haney discuss Sir Charles' golf swing:



Good luck Hank - I don't know if anyone will ever be able to fix Barkley's swing.

Comedian Argus Hamilton on Tiger Woods

One of my favorite sections of the Palm Beach Post on Saturday and Sunday mornings is reading Comedian Argus Hamilton's offbeat take on what's happening in the world.

And lately Hamilton has has a field day with Tiger Woods... and that's what I thought I'd share with you today. So, here's what Argus Hamilton has written over the last 6 weeks on Tiger:

1-10-10: Tiger Woods' wife Elin Nordegren was reported Tuesday seeking a three hundred million dollar divorce settlement. She could be the one who gets all the golfing equipment endorsements from now on. Who wouldn't want to buy the clubs that beat Tiger?

1-7-10: Brit Hume said on Fox News Sunday that Tiger Woods should convert from his Buddhist faith to Christianity as a way to change his life. The golfer is well on his way. He gave every comedian in the United States thirty minutes for Christmas.

1-6-10: Tiger Woods lost his lucrative AT&T endorsement deal on Friday. He was calling fifteen mistresses every morning, texting them all afternoon, and having phone sex with them every night. AT&T had no choice, the employee discount was breaking the company.

1-5-10: The New York Post quoted Tiger Woods' close friends who say he's shopping for rehabs. There aren't that many to choose from. Addiction to cocktail waitresses is fairly common but the number of people who want to kick the habit is fairly small.

12-30-09: Christmas Day began a media frenzy over the attempted bombing of the Northwest flight. The whole world focused on the al-Qaeda bomber from Nigeria and the Dutch hero who saved that plane. It's the first peaceful day Tiger Woods has had in a month.

12-29-09: Golf Digest suspended Tiger Woods's monthly instructional golf articles Friday, continuing his free-fall in sponsor support. Not all of Tiger's corporate sponsors have bailed out. Until an ugly mistress turns up, Lasik Eye Center is standing by him.

12-27-09: Tiger Woods's wife Elin reportedly hired Beverly Hills divorce attorney Sorrell Trope. She's angry that Tiger won't go to rehab for sex and drugs. A married man can forget his mistakes, there is no use two people remembering the same thing.

12-25-09: Tiger Woods's mistresses were analyzed by region Monday and it was found that most of the women who admitted having affairs with him live in Las Vegas. After a month of revelations, one thing is clear. The only thing that stays in Las Vegas is O.J. Simpson.

12-24-09: Mattel's Barbie doll was reported the top selling Christmas toy this year. She is completely up-to-date. Barbie's Dream House now has a nine-iron in the umbrella stand in case Ken starts going to the toy stores and looking at the other Barbie dolls.

Tiger Woods's wife Elin contacted a divorce lawyer on Friday after a fifteenth mistress came out to the tabloids. The list keeps growing. The Postal Service just announced plans to honor Tiger Woods by putting his photograph on the overnight stamp.

12-23-09: John Daly went on CBS News Monday to show that he just lost one hundred pounds with lap band surgery. He was able to cure his problem with surgery. If Elin Woods had picked up a scalpel instead of a nine-iron the same might be said for Tiger Woods.

Tiger Woods caught heat from civil rights leaders Monday about all fifteen of his mistresses being white and none of them being black. You can understand their outrage. President Eisenhower used to send in the National Guard over ratios like this.

12-22-09: Charles Barkley and Michael Jordan publicly begged Tiger Woods to contact them Friday. He's changed his cell phone number and gone underground. If they can switch his addiction from sex to gambling they can save his career because cards don't talk.

Tiger Woods was named Athlete of the Decade by the Associated Press last week. His career is by no means over. In addition to going after Jack Nicklaus's record for most majors he's now in sight of Michael Jordan's record for biggest divorce settlement.

Tiger Woods was reported house hunting in France to escape his daily shaming in the U.S. and British media. The idea isn't new. Two centuries ago Thomas Jefferson purchased Louisiana so he could enjoy an occasional weekend getaway from the Puritans.

12-20-09: London bookmakers began laying odds on how much money Tiger Woods will have to shell out in a divorce settlement with Elin Nordegren. The overs-and-unders is two hundred million dollars. They already agreed to split the house, he gets the outside.

12-18-09: Tiger Woods's approval ratings tumbled fifty-five points in last week's Gallup Poll. He tied George W. Bush's record fifty-five point drop when the war went wrong. It shows that pronunciation doesn't matter, you can be brought down by Iraq or a rack.

Tiger Woods's doctor was arrested in Canada for smuggling human growth hormone. In hindsight you can see it. There were the sudden muscles, the rage, the bad language and the Maris family sitting in the gallery at the last four tournaments.

12-17-09: Tiger Woods registered a fifty-five point approval rating plunge in the Gallup Poll Tuesday with women especially outraged. Sixty-seven percent of all women in America said they're disappointed in him. Each of them thought they were the only one.

The New York Times said Tuesday that Dr. Anthony Galea who treated Tiger Woods in Florida was arrested in Canada for smuggling human growth hormone and other performance-enhancing drugs. Now Tiger's in trouble with Anglo-Saxons. That's cheating.

12-16-09: Tiger Woods took a break from the PGA Tour Monday to try to reconcile with his wife and rebuild his image. We've learned one thing. Tiger Woods is an even greater golfer than anyone could have imagined now that we know he never had time to practice.

Jack Nicklaus said Friday Tiger Woods will eventually figure things out and be forgiven by the public. How gracious. Until now Tiger's goal was to break Jack's record for most major career wins and Wilt Chamberlain's record for most career sacks.

12-15-09: The New York Post reported Thursday that Elin Nordegren decided not to divorce Tiger Woods and stay together despite all the cheating and public humiliation. She almost killed her husband. Tiger's just lucky that Charles Barkley is her swing coach.

Tiger Woods was caught by the tabloids picking up Orlando waitress Mindy Lawton and having sex in his car in a church parking lot. No wonder he got caught. When you're carrying on like that it's a really bad idea to give God your exact coordinates.

12-13-09: Tiger Woods was publicly advised by addiction experts to go to rehab at Sierra Tucson. He's so competitive. Even when he took the twenty-question quiz to find out if he's a sex addict he shot a perfect twenty and got an endorsement deal from Trojan.

Yahoo said the Tiger Woods scandal is the best thing for web traffic since Michael Jackson's death. It's a foolproof mixture of fame, money, sex and Vicodin. Amtrak will be profitable if they can think of a way to put advertising next to a train wreck.

12-11-09: U.S. Congressman Joe Baca withdrew his bill to award Tiger Woods a Congressional Gold Medal Wednesday. It wasn't a decision made lightly. Congress reviewed all the records for screwing people and decided they deserve to keep all the medals themselves.

Yahoo reported that the Tiger Woods scandal resulted in a huge boom for Web traffic at gossip sites. Nobody knows if these stories are credible. It's well known that a lie can make it halfway around the world and back before Tiger can get his pants on.

Gatorade announced Tuesday it's dropping its Tiger Woods sports drink called Tiger Focus. The name has taken on a negative association. To avoid the same problem the Detroit Tigers are going to change their name to the Michigan Tigers.

12-10-09: Florida police issued an eyewitness report saying Tiger Woods was drinking alcohol the night of his wreck. He also had prescriptions for Ambien and Vicodin. Just add a car to this combination and it's easier to crash than a White House state dinner.

Gatorade dropped plans Tuesday to market a Tiger Woods sports drink called Tiger Focus. It's formulated to improve stamina and concentration. Instead of Tiger they're going to hire Dave Letterman to endorse the drink and call it Pace Yourself.

Tiger Woods's wife Elin Nordegren was reported Tuesday to have bought a home in Sweden and moved out of their Florida house. It couldn't last forever. For years he did a great job of keeping her in line, no matter how many women were ahead of her.

12-9-09: Golf Digest's cover article, printed too soon to retract, is called Top Ten Tips Obama Can Take from Tiger Woods. The cover shows Tiger posing as the president's caddy. Next month's cover shows Bill Clinton caddying and giving tips to Tiger Woods.

The National Enquirer got pictures of Tiger Woods picking up a Florida pancake house waitress and going back to her trailer home. No wonder he got caught. If you engage in this kind of behavior long enough eventually you're going to meet Paula Jones.

Tiger Woods offered his wife fifty million dollars Friday as his facial wounds healed. It was ever thus. Someday writers of love songs are going to be held liable for the damages caused by their products, the same as tobacco companies and gunmakers.

12-8-09: Swedish golf star Jesper Parnevik said last week he regretted fixing up his children's nanny Elin with Tiger Woods in the first place. The rules of golf are strict. You're allowed to have fourteen clubs in your bag, however you are not allowed to have a club hostess.

Tiger Woods absolved his wife Elin of all wrongdoing Wednesday, saying she was blameless in their domestic spat. What choice does he have? If his wife goes to prison for attacking him with a golf club he'll have to start paying a babysitter.

Tiger Woods was overheard Thursday begging mistress Jamiee Grubbs to remove her name from her caller ID number. It was urgent. His wife scrolled through his list of callers and she refused to believe that Jamiee Grubbs was a luncheonette in Augusta.

Elin Woods was reportedly holding a pitching wedge or a sand wedge when police found her standing over her bloodied husband. There's a big difference between the two clubs. You use a pitching wedge to cut a lip and a sand wedge to crush a skull.

12-6-08: Tiger Woods apologized for his adultery Wednesday. He cheated on his wife with a mistress, cheated on the mistress with a waitress, then cheated on the waitress with the hostess. Nobody bought his original story that he signed the wrong scorecard.

Tiger Woods was reported on CNBC to have offered Elin fifty-five million dollars to stay in the marriage for seven years and never tell her story. This might work out. It could put the spice back in the marriage if she takes money to sleep with him.

Nike and Gatorade and Gillette backed Tiger Woods on Thursday. The endorsement contracts have a morals clause. It cancels the deal if he does something the company considers immoral like, for instance, if Tiger starts flipping houses they don't have to pay him.

L.A. waitress Jamiee Grubbs played a recorded message from Tiger Woods asking her to hide the affair. She's a cocktail waitress and a receptionist at a medical marijuana store. That means she's just a cocaine connection away from earning her masters in Los Angeles studies.

Tiger Woods's neighbors said both Tiger's mother and his mother-in-law were in the house when he crashed. It won't happen again. The NFL has agreed to air games next Thanksgiving until two in the morning to keep relatives from talking to each other.

12-4-08: Tiger Woods apologized for his transgressions Tuesday as proof of his adultery surfaced. He cheated on his wife with a mistress then he cheated on his mistress with a waitress. Premier Silvio Berlusconi just awarded him Italy's Medal of Freedom.

Tiger Woods came clean about his adultery Tuesday when sordid and sleazy voicemails he left for his mistress were aired. It had to be a humbling moment for the greatest golfer ever. For all his titles and all his victories, sex remains undefeated.

12-3-08: President Obama gave a speech Tuesday detailing how he plans to get out of Afghanistan. He pre-empted A Charlie Brown Christmas on ABC. It'll air next week unless it's pre-empted by Tiger Woods's speech detailing how he plans to get out of the house.

Tiger Woods was named as a lover by a Las Vegas waitress Monday. His wife will come out of this fine. By the time this is over Elin will have her name on a new line of golf clubs with the shafts bent exactly in the shape of her husband's profile.

Florida police cited Tiger Woods for careless driving Tuesday, however his wife Elin is not out of trouble for smashing the Escalade window with a golf club. The law's clear. Cadillac is owned by the taxpayers and it's a crime to deface U.S. currency.

12-2-08: President Obama was shown in a photo with Michaela Salahi at a polo match five years ago. The beautiful blonde somehow got into the state dinner without an invite. Tiger Woods called the president and told him not to leave the golf clubs by the door.

Florida cops investigated the car crash that ended up with Tiger Woods knocked out and his wife holding a golf club over him. They say no alcohol was involved. It's a perfect chance for John Daly to step forward and point out that sobriety kills.

Tiger Woods announced Monday he's canceling his appearance at the charity golf tourney he sponsors in suburban Los Angeles. He explained in a prepared statement that he was injured. You don't need to look at his MRI to see that he pulled a Clinton.

12-1-08: The global climate conference meets in Copenhagen this week to propose national controls on industry and people to battle global warming. It's a phantom issue. Last night it was so cold in Florida that Tiger Woods' wife was sticking to her story.

Tiger Woods hit a fire hydrant and a tree while backing out of his driveway in his Escalade. Scrutiny was intense. Johnny Miller said considering the narrowness of the driveway and the placement of the fire hydrant, he should have gone with the Buick.

Tiger Woods was found by cops Thursday lying on the street bleeding with his Swedish blonde wife standing over him with a six-iron. How chilling. It made people wonder for the first time in fifteen years if it's possible that O.J. killed Nicole in self-defense.

A special thanks to Argus Hamilton for letting me reprint his words. To find out more on Hamilton or how to book him to speak please CLICK HERE to visit his website.

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