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June 04, 2004

I can't stand Tiger!

First off, why does everyone kiss his ass? I could never figure this out. There are other players out there with a lot more charisma and that are much more interesting than he is.

Why don't I like him, hmmm...this could be a long list, but here's a few reasons.

1. He slams his clubs too much. Good "role model"! I really want my kids to be like this. Curse & slam their clubs every other shot.
2. He always has excuses. ex. I adjusted this, food poisoning that, pulled this, blah, blah, blah. Hit the practice range & cut your bellyaching, no one cares.
3. How the hell did he get Jesper's nanny. Oh yea, that's an easy one, he's got a lot of money.
4. It's great that so many people like Tiger & our golf courses are now much more crowded with new golfers. How wonderful, I love playing 18 holes in 6 hours behind newbie golfers.

Trust you me, I will be adding to this list...


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Couch Potato said...

"Help me if you can I'm feeling down" - I also think I must be lost.

I was searching for Elvis and somehow ended up in your blog, but you know I'm sure I saw him on the golf course yesterday. Now this is strange because usually I see him in the supermarket.

Honest really, last time I saw him there he was right in front of me, next to the steaks singing "Love me Tender".

He said to me (his lip was only slightly curled) "Boy, you need to get yourself a shiny, new lcd tv to go with that blue suede sofa of yours.

But Elvis said I, In the Ghetto nobody has a lcd tv .

Dude I'm All Shook Up said Elvis. I think I'll have me another cheeseburger.

Then I'm gonna go home, put ma dancin' suit on, munch me some uppers and freak out to that maaaaaaaaad surfing scene in Apocalypse Now on ma lcd tv .

How cool is that boy?

And then he just walked out of the supermarket singing. . .

"You give me love and consolation,
You give me strength to carry on "

Strange day or what? :-)

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