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August 30, 2004

Woody Austin: Wins Buick, Wears Ugliest Shirts on Tour

Congrats to Woody Austin on winning the Buick Challenge. Maybe now Woody Austin can afford some golf shirts that don't look like rejects from the Crayola factory. I honestly think the reason Woody had not won in 9 years is because of the ugliness of the shirts he wears.

I suggest those of you with weak stomachs not look at the images below.

My theory on why Woody Austin had not won in 9 years is this: Woody wears some of the ugliest golf shirts ever made. His shirts have so many things going on and so many different colors, he gets distracted. These distractions cause Woody Austin's eyes to lose their focus on the ball which in turn causes poor golf shots. I suggest now that you have made a nice check Woody, you hire someone to pick out some shirts that are not so busy. Perhaps one simple color or maybe a stripe or two. And while you're at it, burn all of the ugly shirts in your closet.


timmay!!!!! said...

dorkiest champion of the year....thanx for the giftwrapped victory tim herron....thanx for missing every putt that mattered corey pavin....

the GHO, er Buick something or other, has slipped for three reasons:

1) lack of a quality field
2) champions like woody austin

tournaments that are played after the four majors have been completed = a yawn followed by a yawn

i tried to watch...really i did....

but um...

a catatonic feeling waved over me....

and drowned me,


timmay!!!!! said...


my counting abilities appear to have slipped as well.

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